Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Barefoot and Pregnant

So, knowing I'm pregnant again is taking some getting used to. I really thought we were finished. Of course, I was using no type of contraceptive or anything. I just had the feeling we were done. So color me surprised when the little test told me the opposite. 3 Kids!!! I don't think I'm ready. I do like the age gaps though. They will all grow up together and leave home one after the other.

Danae is excited but says she only wants a sister. She doesn't need any more brothers. I've been trying to explain that I have no say in the matter. But like most kids, she thinks her parents can do anything including decide the baby's gender. I told her to pray about it.

I don't mind having another kid but I don't really feel like being pregnant again or going through another delivery. However, I feel really blessed to be able to experience parenthood again, especially since 6 years ago I was told I was infertile. I'm just not ready to look like this.


Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Visiting Family

We had a good week in Florida. We were able to see both of our families in one shot. Here are pictures from our trip:

My dad with the kiddies

4 year old Anaya

Shania, Courtney, and Jordan

Dwayne and Brayden playing at Pensacola Beach

Danae playing in the sand at Pensacola Beach

Jayden being silly

Shania eating soup

Rachel playing the piano with Danae and Brayden providing the vocals

Visiting with our friends, the Campbell Family

Danae and Deja - cousins who still suck their fingers

Danae with Uncle Derrell and Auntie Evelyn

My handsome nephews - Woodrow and Kavey

Almost the entire Gibson family. One of our nieces wasn't able to make the trip to Tallahassee.

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Domestic Violence

Yesterday, I watched a DVR'ed episode of an old Oprah show about the lady whose husband set her on fire. I always find it interesting that people let relationships get to that point. Granted, she was trying to break free but it seems it was too little, too late. Thankfully, I've never been in a violent relationship. And, although I say I would kill that fool in his sleep if he tried it, who knows what would really happen. No one would say "I'm going to stay and take it".

My parents never had those type of issues. The biggest arguments I remember were over watching certain TV shows on the "big TV". My dad always wanted to watch a game and my mom would stand in front of the television because she wanted to watch her show. We had 2 other televisions in the house but they both wanted that one. Silly parents!

I did have people I loved in those situations though. And, it's sad. Really. My cousin, F, has been married for about 25 years or longer to a man who has never been worth her affections. When we were little, they fought. I didn't see that very much but we all knew what was going on. He never provided for the family, frequently left home for extended periods of time, and of course he had the requisite mistress or 20 in his life. Complete with a couple of outside kids. The crazy part is that they're still together. They're too old for the fighting part anymore. They just co-exist in the same household in a weird relationship that only they know. They're comfortable with one another. Her self-esteem is so shot that she never thought she could do better. And, who would want a woman with 3 kids. What she didn't understand was that she didn't need someone else to want her. She needed to love herself.

So, of course, her daughter, A, followed her footsteps. She married only a few years ago who has cheated on her continuously. They fought. They have 2 children together. She had 1 previously and he had 3 previously. That's 6 children who get to watch the dysfunction all around. The only difference between her husband and her father is that he will go to work. She packed up her stuff one day and left. She said she was tired of being a fool every day. It's hard on her but she understands the danger of raising children in that environment.

The last example is my friend K. She married young and was involved in a physically violent relationship. This one is the most interesting to me. I would go home and see huge bruises on her thighs from where he stomped on her when she was already on the floor. Once, my husband and I were outside of their house and heard them fighting. I tried to get my husband to intervene but he didn't. He was upset because she was outside and went in with the full intent of starting some mess. She reveled in being the victim. She instigated a lot of stupid crap. She knew which buttons to push. Now, don't think I'm saying it's her fault. No one deserves to be hit and no man should hit a woman. Period. But, it is interesting that he is now remarried and is a very good husband. There is no fighting in this relationship. No drama. The thing is, K somehow got off on being a woman who was being beaten. She had no problem showing off her bruises, unlike most women who go through a lot to hide them. Most of her bruises were in hidden places but she would lift her pants leg or roll up her sleeves to make sure people knew what was going on. Weird, huh? The kicker is that he asked for a divorce because he wasn't satisfied with the dynamics of the relationship and knew it wouldn't work after they tried counseling. Does he really sound so horrible now? She was upset with him for ending the marriage.

I wrote all of this to say I still don't understand those type of relationships. I suppose you have to think very little of yourself to allow someone to treat you that way. I just hope and pray that my daughter never finds a man like that. If she does, I know her daddy will have no problem going in that house. And, my son better not ever become that man.

Monday, July 07, 2008

I am not a morning person

But, I wake up every morning between 5:30 and 6:00 so I can get things done before my children wake up. This morning, Danae woke up just after 6 telling me "it's not dark outside anymore." That's her reason for being up so early. So, I tried to do my own thing. She asked if I would give her a vitamin and breakfast. So, my daughter and I ate breakfast together at 6:30. She's now in my bed because she's cold. In about an hour, I'll have to repeat the same thing for her brother. I hate it when they throw me off my schedule.

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Beauty Stuff

I have always been a bit of a tomboy. And, I'm cool with that most of the time. But the older I get, the more interested I am in beauty related topics. And, I realize just how little I know. Example, I've never purchased a single thing from Sephora's. I don't know any other women that can say that. Unless they don't have a Sephora in their city.

Anyway, for those of you who are interested in beauty related things, you should check out this post.

http://blog.sephora.com/2008/06/guest-blogger-monica-mingos-five-faves.html

Later y'all!