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15 Days To Go... Really about facebook friends

Every post will probably have my countdown in it. I can't believe that in 15 days (or less) I will have my new baby girl in my arms. I'm so excited! Now off to the real post.

The good and bad thing about Facebook is that you can reconnect with past friends and associates. Let me tell you about a couple of them.

In middle school, I met one of my cousins. We attended the same school and were both in the drama club. One day, we had a competition and my mom thought this girl looked like her family. Then, she asked her name and found out her last name was the same as my grandfather's (mom's dad). Well, he was definitely a rolling stone and it turned out that the schoolmate (J) was my cousin. Her grandfather and my mom were siblings, or half-siblings. So, for a minute, J and I thought that was cool. Except she was a little crazy. She had a serious hangup when it came to complexion and hair texture. She was (and still is) a gorgeous girl with flawless chocolate skin. If anything, I should have been jealous of her. But, she had been told all her life that light is better and she took it out on me. What she didn't know then was that I also had a hangup and absolutely hated my complexion because I felt I looked too white. Ah, middle schoolers and their craziness! After middle school, her family ended up moving out of the city and we lost contact. No love was lost because really we only talked because of the family connection and otherwise wouldn't have even been friends. Last week, we became facebook 'friends' and I realized she is just as crazy as before. We really didn't have to reconnect. She has a gorgeous little girl who looks just like her except she's about my complexion with silky, wavy hair. J said 'you see I got me a little mixed girl like you.' Ugh!

Moving on...

I reconnected with another friend. We met in elementary school. We went to an all-black school. There was 1 white girl in the entire school and two biracials. Me and N. She was half-black, half-Korean. In elementary school, we were tight. She was cool and there were no problems. Then, we went to middle school and she became a white girl. Totally threw me off! She shunned everything that had to do with black folks, including her dad. Well, none of her white friends knew she had a black daddy at home so of course they couldn't go home with her. She had folks thinking she was white and Korean, although I don't know how she explained her hair because it was long and kinky. She went through great pains to identify herself as a white girl and it pissed me off. We had been friends for maybe 5 years including the entire summer before middle school. She lived in a black neighborhood and played with black kids every afternoon. But, at school, she was white. We went to different high schools but this continued. We reconnected on facebook. She is now married to a white guy with two very cute little boys. I did see pictures of her black father on her page so I'm hoping she's finally comfortable in her own skin. I have no problems with her having mostly white friends but I do have a huge problem with her denying a part of herself.

Of course, I have reconnected with others who seem to be doing well, even better than before. That's really nice to see. Time and distance made us lose contact and it's nice to be able to drop a line or two sometimes.

Comments

Anonymous said…
I'm considering the whole facebook thing but mostly b/c I guess I need to get with the times. I find it amusing though the number of ppl who have info on ppl all via facebook but have not actually had a conversation with them which is bothersome to me. But I may be doing that sometime...later maybe before residency.
Lonna
Anonymous said…
I am still not convinced. However, I am glad that you still enjoy it.

So Feb. 1, came and left. Oh well, sooner than later the little princess will be here. I can't wait either.

Red
Anonymous said…
There are days I really like facebook and there are days I don't. I wish it could just be me and a few close friends so I could share more. But because there are 50 million people wanting to be your friend, I just said forget it. lol

Trinimerican

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