The Odyssey

Is it just me or did this week just fly by. I went to the doctor yesterday and found out I haven't dilated at all. I really thought I had by now. I can't wait to see my baby girl. I'm finally getting excited now. I just might actually start getting stuff for her, like pampers and such. She is supposed to be here really soon. My mom died almost 15 years ago. That is such a long time. Sometimes, I can't remember specific things about her and I hate it. Danae is so confused about why granny (my stepmom) isn't my mom. She has seen pictures of my deceased mom but really still doesn't get it. I'm so glad this Sabbath is my last one for teaching the cradle roll class for a while. I like to move and get on the floor with the kids and that's becoming increasingly harder. Danae is no longer in cradle roll but she says her class is not as much fun. Brayden is really the sweetest boy ever. He is so generous with the hugs and kisses. We just might have to keep him ar...

So, our efforts of downplaying Danae's birthday really went out the window. This just means that we'll have to really go all out for poor Brayden. When I asked her what she wanted to do for her birthday, she said she wanted a manicure/pedicure and to get her hair done. Crazy, I know. Anyway, this is what she did. Her godmother took her to get a mani/pedi last Monday. I wish I could upload the picture from my phone but this is a picture of her actual hands and feet. They won't look very different because she only has clear polish on her hands and cotton candy on her feet (but it looks clear). (her little fat toes are so cute to me) On Wednesday (her actual birthday), we went to the Rainforest Cafe for dinner. It was the best night because it happened to also be their kids night. So, they had a clown and people dressed up like animals and she thought it was all for her. (Brayden helped her eat her birthday dessert) (Why is Dwayne cheesing so hard?) On Friday, she went to the ...

Brittany, Georgia's daughter, told me something on Sunday that made me fight back the tears. Georgia had a stroke on Danae's 4th birthday. While she was lying on the floor, unable to move, she said "Brittany, I forgot to call Nae Nae to tell her happy birthday!" She was always thinking of other people, even at her darkest moment. I told Danae that Auntie Sis Melville said "Happy Birthday" and she was happy to hear that. Now, I just have to find a way to explain this death to a VERY inquisitive child. Feel free to give me ideas. Just keep in mind that she asks so many questions that I had to explain what a stroke is because she wouldn't accept just hearing that Georgia was sick and in the hospital.

For those of you who don't already know, Georgia Melville died over the weekend. We are all very shaken up by this but we know that God knows best. The point of this post is just that we need to remember how important it is to appreciate each other every day and every time we see one another. Sometimes we may have to inconvenience ourselves but we must let each other know that we really care because you never know when it will be too late. In December, our church's school had their Christmas play. After the play, I asked Georgia if her daughter's school was going to have a play. She said yes and told me when it was. I told her I would be there. On the day of her daughter's play, I was really tired and Dwayne was out of town on a business trip. I still went to the play because I promised I would. Georgia was so happy I actually showed up and told a few others about it. It made me glad I went even though I honestly thought about missing it. Earlier this month, I received ...

25 more days to go! At least that's how long I have until my due date. Of course, I'm hoping Danica comes a little sooner but whatever's best. Danae is going to a salon for the first time today to get her hair done. I can't wait to see how she acts because she is so scary of everything. I also can't wait to see how she looks. Brayden still doesn't understand that he can't lunge on my stomach. I have learned all kind of defense maneuvers that won't hurt him in the process. My dad forgot Danae's birthday. He thought it was Feb 21st. He said I'm having too many children and he can't keep up. I made him feel bad for it though. I have to change clothes in the middle of the night every night because I have been sweating profusely. That ain't cute. I'm not ready to have my sleep disrupted by a newborn. Hopefully, she'll be like Danae and start sleeping through the night at 2 months. I can not wait to find out what my brother-in-law and h...

I have gotten this in email form from a few folks. So, I decided to answer it on my blog so anyone can read it if they choose. And, I don't have to forward it to other folks who aren't interested either. Anyway, here goes. 1.What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before? Lay a wood floor. Visit Hong Kong. Ride a horse on a volcano. Many things, actually. 2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don't make resolutions. 3. Did anyone close to you give birth? I always know people who are giving birth because everyone and their mama keeps having kids. My friends LATANYA/TERA , Ruth, Keisha, Brenda, and Shirley gave birth this year. I think that's it. 4. Did anyone close to you die? My cousin and I still haven't dealt with my grief. I just try to push it into the corners of my mind. 5. What countries did you visit? I visited the Philippines and Hong Kong . 6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008? M...

For those of you who do not believe in the power of God, please excuse yourself from this post. I'll be back with something new tomorrow. I don't mean to offend but I have a request for those who believe in God. A member of my church, named Georgia, had a stroke last night and emergency surgery to save her life. I'm asking you to pray for her health and for comfort and peace for her family. She is married with two children. Georgia is a young woman, in her 40's (I think). I don't have any updates on her current status but will update this post if I find out anything. Thank you.

Today, my daughter became a four year old. I can't believe it! It feels like I was just welcoming her into this world and we're now celebrating her fourth year of life. I feel so blessed to have been chosen to be her mother. I'm humbled by the task that God gave us and parents everywhere. The very fact that he entrusts her care to us is mind blowing. Danae is such a special little girl. She's warm and nurturing, she's friendly yet cautious, she loves to take care of other people, and has an amazing memory. My wish for her is that she grows up to love God and her fellow man, that she is always humble and respectful of others, that she never forgets who she is, and that she is ready to spend eternity with her Creator. Anything else that she accomplishes will just be icing on the cake. I have a different (though not better) connection with Danae than I will have with my other children. It's simply because she was my firstborn. She has taught me just as much as I...

President Obama is so inspirational. I love to hear him speak. This isn't the first time I've watched an inauguration ceremony. I love formal ceremonies in general and have watched the inaugurations since I was a child. But, this one just felt different. I can't explain how it made me feel. I made my children sit and watch the swearing in. They enjoyed hearing "Hail to the Chief" and Brayden marched around the room while it was played. If I didn't happen to be 8 months pregnant, my family would've been among the masses in D.C. Apparently, it wasn't meant to be and we watched on the television while Dwayne and I texted each other. He watched at work.

I don't know about you, but in my family, we've dealt with a lot of death and sickness. I've noticed, though, that once the person dies they are elevated into a sort of sainthood. They become people who have only done good in their lives. Their dirty little secrets and past mistakes are erased. My mother died almost 15 years ago now. One day, we were having a casual conversation about my childhood versus my children's childhood. I mentioned some things that I do that I got directly from my parents and other things from my husband's parents. Then, we also mentioned how we realize our parents did some things wrong and we choose to not repeat them. My dad felt insulted. He kept saying that my mom was the best mom, blah, blah, blah. I tried to explain to him that I agree with that statement because I do feel she did the best she knew how. But, she was nowhere near perfect. She did some bad stuff too. He feels that once a person dies, we should focus only on the good and...

So, my friend has been trying to get me on My Space or Facebook for a few years now. I just didn't feel like being bothered. Dwayne's cousins had been trying to get him on for a while too. He gave in to the peer pressure and then I gave in to the spousal pressure. I almost deleted my account for a few reasons. One, I don't want to befriend anyone I don't know and never knew. Then, I started getting friend requests from people who grew up with Dwayne but I don't know them at all. I thought this things was going to be really annoying. But then, I got a friend request from someone I met probably 15-20 years ago. She's from Pensacola and is friends with my older cousin. I ignored it for a couple of days but then decided to accept her. I'm so glad I did. She lives just up the street in Austin. She homeschools her children (ages 6 and 11) and was able to pass along some great information to help me with my little ones. And, even though y'all didn't know th...

My dad came to visit us for Christmas. While he was here, he was saying how much Danae reminds him of me when I was a little girl. I wasn't surprised because she definitely has my attitude and a lot of my personality. But, I was surprised when he told me his reason. She's such a girlie girl. I was shocked because I'm not girlie at all. Then, he pulled out some pictures from when I was little. For some reason, this man always has random pictures with him but they're not in a photo album or anything. Anyway, in most of them I had on a dress and was playing with my dolls or my toy kitchen or something like that. I told him that was impossible because I always thought of myself as more of a tomboy. So, what had happened was, I really was much more interested in feminine things. But, my mom kinda nipped that. She wasn't so girlie and couldn't relate and chose to ignore that part of me. When I was little, I used to get my hair done every other Saturday. I thought it w...

So, as I've said before, I'm getting my tubes tied this year. I have had so many people tell me they don't agree with this. I've been told that I should let God decide how many children we have or ask him to close my womb. I should wait and see if I want more children in the future. It's too permanent. What if something happens to my children and I decide I want more later. I honestly didn't expect to run in to so much opposition. First of all, it's my body and my decision. Secondly, I am absolutely sure that I don't want more children. And lastly, it really is my decision. The funny thing is that my friend who has 5 children has received a lot of criticism for the size of her family and was told repeatedly that she should've gotten her tubes tied. Now, there are other circumstances in that particular family that would warrant such remarks. But my point is that people are never satisfied. If we continued to have children, I'm sure someone would s...

Last night, I had a horrible dream. Danae was kidnapped. The worse part is that I actually saw it happen but was powerless to help her. She was taken by some folks who looked homeless or something because they were dirty and disheveled. The people told me I would never be able to find her and I believed them. My dreams are extremely vivid. Most of the time, when I wake up, I have to figure out if they were real or not. The only reason I immediately knew this was a dream was only because I was in my bed and everything happened outside. I still had to go and make sure my baby was in her bed though. If anything ever happened to my kids, I feel certain that I would probably lose my mind. I can take a lot of things but that would just be too much to bear. I can't even watch some movies or shows now that involve people hurting kids because I imagine how it would feel for it to happen to us.

Danae went to her first Adventurers meeting yesterday. It really amazes me that my little baby is old enough to be an Adventurer. It seems like she was just born the other day. Anyway, she really enjoyed being there. I look forward to seeing her in her uniform and going camping and all the other fun stuff. It was so cute when they were learning how to get in prayer attention and the other little drills. Brayden was so sad that he couldn't go with her but I just reminded him that he can go when he's old enough. He had to stay home with daddy. When we got back, he asked her a million questions about what she did at the meeting. My aunt called me yesterday to let me know that she purchased her ticket to come and help me when the baby comes. I'm so very happy! She came when Danae was a newborn and was such a big help. She also came out when I went back to work after Brayden was born. I thought she might not make it this year because she's getting older and she said she wasn...

This is my 26th month of being pregnant during my lifetime and I'm tired. I'm trying not to complain but I'm really tired. That's all.

I was watching Law and Order: SVU last night and the show was about a man who was drugging and then raping women. He apparently was charming enough to engage them in a conversation and the next thing you know the deed was done and they didn't even remember it. Sometimes, shows like this make me so grateful. In my youth, I did a lot of stupid things. I drank heavily, went clubbing far too often, and just took unnecessary risks with my life. Stupid things! I can remember living in McGuinn dorm at FAMU and coming home extremely drunk. First of all, I drove myself home which was a danger to me and everyone else on the roads at that time. Then, they decided to have a middle of the night fire drill. My roommate had to drag me out onto the steps because I literally couldn't walk. Another night, I ended up spending the night at a f striend's house because I was so drunk that I passed out in her car. And, she said she wasn't about to drag my butt up the steps to my dorm room. I ...

I'm sure you remember Chris Rock's stand up routine where he says your number one goal when raising a daughter is to keep her off the pole. That, he says, is the sure sign that you have failed as a father. So, imagine my laughter (and Dwayne's disgust) when Danae tells us at least once a week that she likes swinging on poles. Granted, she's talking about our bed posts but it seriously makes me laugh every single time because it freaks Dwayne out so much. The same thing happens when she talks about her imaginary friend named Mark. I can't imagine how he will be when she hits the teen years. *** Yesterday, I had a longer-than-necessary conversation with Brayden about why he's not a man. I told him that he's such a big boy because he is finally acting like he's actually potty trained. His response: "I'm not a big boy. I'm a man." Me: "Uh, no, son, you're a big boy. Daddy's a man." Him: "No, mommy, I'm a man, a bi...

Believe it or not, when I was in high school, I took a few Fashion Marketing classes. It was mainly because I like to see the layouts in magazines, stores, on billboards, etc. I like how designers market their wares. A part of this class included having display windows and coming up with ad layouts. To this day, I still love looking at the ads in fashion magazines and store display windows. Some of the best I've ever seen (outside of NY which is great) were in Manila. The people there are serious about their malls and the windows alone would make you all giddy. And that's saying a lot for someone like me who doesn't really like to shop. Today, I read something talking about creating inspiration boards, like they use on the HGTV shows. This is something I'm going to start doing, although maybe in a notebook or something instead. I'm a visual person and I have to see things (or draw them) in order to fully appreciate them. I think my friend Red's husband used to d...

For the past two weeks, Dwayne has been on vacation. That means our home life has been drastically different. We've been playing and relaxing and just enjoying one another. Well, today, we have to get back to our normal way of doing things. I have to start my kid's "school" again. They have to get back on their normal sleep schedule because they've been staying up way too late most nights. At least, we'll be okay for about 6 weeks. And then, the real disrupting force will be here. I think we decided on a name, Danica Aliyah. They mean "morning star" and "noble, sublime". You know I love for names to have a good meaning. We're all eagerly anticipating the arrival of our baby but no one is more excited than Danae. She prays for her every night and talks to her several times throughout the day. Brayden likes to kiss my tummy and talk to her too. I hope this love continues when they're faced with the reality of a crying, pooping, spitti...

On this first day of a brand new year, I was able to spend time with the people I love most, my family. My husband fixed omelets for our late breakfast, the kids and I decorated a gingerbread house, we went shopping, and just hung out with each other. It was perfect! Last night, we sat outside in the cold while igniting fireworks in front of our house. Danae ran away scared and Brayden shivered more than necessary. But, as soon as we came back inside, they both exclaimed that they had fun. I don't make resolutions because I'm sure I would break them. But, I do hope that I become a better person this year, that I learn new things, travel to new place, and experience all that God has for me. I look forward to meeting my daughter and watching my children grow and learn. Hopefully, I'll become a better wife, mother, friend, daughter, and woman.